Who am I? How to Make it a Habit

I am your constant companion.

I am your greatest helper or your heaviest burden.

I will push you onward or drag you down to failure.

I am completely at your command.

Half the things you do, you might just as well turn over to me,

and I will be able to do them quickly and correctly.

I am easily managed; you must merely be firm with me.

Show me exactly how you want something done, and after a few lessons I will do it automatically.

I am the servant of all great men.

And, alas, of all failures as well.

Those who are great, I have made great.

Those who are failures, I have made failures.

I am not a machine, though I work with all the precision of a machine.

Plus, the intelligence of a man.

You may run me for profit, or run me for ruin; it makes no difference to me.

Take me, train me, be firm with me and I will put the world at your feet.

Be easy with me, and I will destroy you.

Who am I?

 I am a HABIT!

(Anonymous)

When talking about habits we almost always think of bad habits, and can usually point to a couple of our own as examples! However many habits are almost totally subconscious and relate to routine daily activities we hardly think about, and we only realise when circumstances force us to change. One of my many subconscious habits was putting my right arm into a coat before my left - no big deal one of those routing activities - until my left arm developed a frozen shoulder. Now my habit was painful as I bent my left arm round my back to put it into my coat after my right.  So I had to consciously think each time I put my coat on to put my left arm in first - to avoid having to bend it.  It took quite a while, and there were quite a few occasions where I forgot and suffered accordingly! Now my unconscious habit is to put my left arm in first.

Why am I sharing this?  Because breaking bad habits and setting good ones isn’t easy, especially if the bad ones have been established over many years. It takes time, but the rewards can be great.  In my particular case the reward was no pain! To get rid of bad habits we first need to recognise it as a habit, ‘I smoke’. Next decide what’s going to change - and just as importantly why - ‘I’m going to stop smoking - because I want to be healthier’ (if you can phrase the why in a positive way - in the stop smoking example the why is being healthier rather than because it’s bad for me it’s more inspiring to your subconscious).  Then decide how you are going to beat your bad habit, in our example will it be cold turkey? gradual decline over a period? 

That’s the easy bit, putting it into practice is the hard part.  The only way to do this is to be strict with yourself and put conscious effort into developing your new habit ‘I don’t smoke’. 

Ways to help - 

Let others know that you are making the change, ask for their support, and to remind you when necessary.

If the habit is situational try avoiding the trigger situations through the initial part of your habit breaking journey, avoid pubs! 

Build in rewards - after a week give yourself a treat

Write down your progress and successes

Make sure you recognise the benefits - if you are stopping smoking what can you do now that you couldn’t before? or put the money you would have spent on cigarettes into a jar, or savings account and watch it grow

Imagine what it’s going to be like when you’ve changed your habit

It will take time, but you will succeed.

The above also applies to developing new habits - trying to start something new is just as difficult as stopping something that’s been a habit for years.  There is one extra tip for developing a new habit that doesn't apply to breaking bad ones.

Set a schedule, whether it’s to read more or start a fitness routine, some habits benefit from having a set time - plus if you’ve got a diary note you are more likely to do whatever it is you want to do.

Whether breaking bad ones, or developing new habits it’s vital to forgive yourself if you have a set-back and keep on going.

‘Watch your thoughts, they become your words. Watch your words, they become your actions. Watch your actions, they become your habits. Watch your habits, they become your character. Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.’ (Lao Tzu)